The article discusses the concept of superpersistent AI through the metaphor of an immortal snail, which symbolizes relentless pursuit despite obstacles. The author relates this to increasingly intelligent and persistent artificial intelligence tools like ChatGPT, highlighting how these technologies can now perform complex tasks with ease and efficiency, often surpassing human capabilities. The piece focuses on examples where AI completes challenging technical work rapidly without direct oversight, underscoring the growing influence of superintelligent systems in daily operations.
Written by the local model on 2026-09-15,
using this article's own text rather than the other coverage of the
same event (that is the story summary below).
Have you ever heard about the Immortal Snail?
asserted
you → hear → Snail
It’s an intermittently popular internet meme that goes something like this:
You’re offered 10 million dollars.
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You → ’ → dollars
What’s the catch?
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What → ’ → ?
A snail will spend the rest of eternity trying to track you down.
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snail → spend → you
That’s its only goal in life.
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That → ’ → life
If it touches you, it kills you.
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it → touch → you
But otherwise, it just moves as slowly as a regular snail.
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it → move → snail
So, do you take the deal?
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you → take → deal
“This is the dumbest hypothetical question ever,” said one of the co-hosts of the Rooster Teeth podcast, which introduced the meme in 2014.
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which → say → 2014
It’s dumb because there’s nowhere near enough information to answer the question.
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It → ’ → question
For instance, can the snail swim?
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snail → swim → instance
(Otherwise, you could just move to Hawaii.)
uncertain
you → move → Hawaii
Does it move monotonically toward your current location, taking the shortest route as recommended by Google Maps: Snail Edition?
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it → move → Edition
Or can it engage in some degree of strategic planning?
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it → engage → planning
Can you capture it in a jar?
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you → capture → jar
Apart from immortality, what other special powers does it have?
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it → have → powers
The various authors of Immortal Snail memes don’t necessarily agree on these parameters.
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authors → agree → parameters
But a Reddit post that reintroduced the Immortal Snail in 2016 described the snail as “super intelligent.”1
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that → reintroduce → snail
This seems like a rather important detail.
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This → seem → detail
What every version of the meme agrees upon is that while the snail is slow, it’s also what you might call “superpersistent”.
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you → agree → what
It can’t die; it won’t be deterred.
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it → die → ?
I’d still happily take my chances with the infernal thing if it just stupidly crawls along at snail speed — about 0.03 miles per hour — toward your current location.
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it → take → location
But what about a superintelligent, superpersistent snail that can anticipate your routine — Nate often has poker night on Mondays — evade detection, and coordinate with other snails that might act as decoys?
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that → anticipate → decoys
I’d have to plan my whole life around that thing.
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I → have → thing
You can probably see where I’m going with this.
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I → see → this
AI is getting much smarter — and much more persistent
There are still times when AI tools can be frustrating.
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tools → get → ?
But there are more and more days when it feels like we’re living in the singularity.
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we → be → singularity
I had a lot on my plate.
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I → have → plate
Our midterms model needed another patch because of continued weirdness in Alaska.
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model → need → Alaska
And our NFL model wasn’t quite ready yet, with the season only eight days away from starting.
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model → start → season
But I handled the Alaska issue by recoding FLIPR by speaking to ChatGPT on my phone while getting out of the subway, and sent the new version of the model to Eli a few minutes later.
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I → handle → Eli
Then while at the gym, I had ChatGPT rewrite the code our NFL model uses to apply the league’s complex tiebreaking procedures.
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model → have → procedures
This task is almost ideally suited for LLMs — purely algorithmic, no judgment involved.
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judgment → suit → LLMs
Still, what took me two painful days last year, ChatGPT solved in about 15 minutes.
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ChatGPT → take → minutes
All of this without my opening a laptop or touching a keyboard.
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my → open → keyboard
These sorts of minor miracles are happening more and more often.
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sorts → happen → miracles
I’ve put in hundreds of hours since March working on a series of statistical models for Silver Bulletin: first, COOPER (NCAA basketball), then
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I → put → Bulletin
That all of this took so much of my time might not sound like the best advertisement for AI.
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took → take → AI
Don’t get me wrong: we’re probably still a ways away from when a one-shot prompt on Claude or ChatGPT will be able to build a complex Silver Bulletin-type model on its own.
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prompt → get → own
Indeed, “vibecoding” feels like a misnomer in this context.
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vibecoding → feel → context
…and 187 more, not listed.
The Aporia
