Dear Abby: My brother-in-law won’t talk to be because I refuse to be his nanny

Read the original at New York Post ↗
Cite

Abby, D. (2026, October 18). Dear Abby: My brother-in-law won’t talk to be because I refuse to be his nanny. New York Post. https://nypost.com/2026/10/18/lifestyle/dear-abby-my-brother-in-law-wont-talk-to-be-because-i-refuse-to-be-his-nanny/

Dated from the outlet's own feed. Check the original for its byline.

New York Post · collected 2026-10-18 · by Dear Abby analysis

Quick Summary

A reader named "No Nanny" writes to advice columnist Dear Abby about her strained relationship with her brother-in-law and sister after she refused his request to be their nanny three days a week for their new child. The article focuses on the tension that arises when familial expectations clash with personal boundaries, specifically regarding professional and emotional support. Abby advises "No Nanny" not to feel guilty for setting boundaries and highlights the imbalance in the perceived value of different forms of help offered by both sides.
Written locally by qwen2.5:14b on 2026-10-18, using this article's own text rather than the other coverage of the same event (that is the story summary below).

AI analysis runs on qwen2.5:14b, locally

Story summary

A reader of "Dear Abby" columnist advice column wrote in on October 18, 2026, expressing distress over her strained relationship with her brother-in-law following her refusal to work as a nanny for her twin sister's newborn child. The writer runs a small business with her father and declined the offer from her sister and brother-in-law to provide childcare three days per week after her sister's maternity leave ends. She explained that she works hard in her current role and does not want such a significant responsibility, despite her brother-in-law's belief that he has provided help for her family by handling tasks like garbage removal, snow clearing, and mechanical issues. This refusal led to the brother-in-law ceasing communication with her, believing she was unable to do them this "favor."

Written for “Brother In Law Refuses To Speak” on 2026-10-18, grounded in this article and the 0 other(s) covering the same event.

Story

📰 Brother In Law Refuses To Speak
Entertainment · 1 article(s) covering the same event.

Compared with similar articles

Nothing to compare against. No article is close enough to this one for the pipeline to have linked or judged the pair.
How this article was measured signals, leaning charts, publisher record, byline, topics and claims

Signals How these are calculated →

Claims extracted
28
sentences that state something as happening or true
Uncertain
7%
2 of 28 hedged ("reportedly", "may", "according to")
Leaning
not political
takes no side on a contested political question
Publisher signals
67/100
New York Post's corrections and hedging, across everything collected from it. Not a measure of accuracy.
Outlets on this story
1
Entertainment
Same framing elsewhere
1
articles that frame the event the way this one does
Analyzed 2026-10-18 · how these are computed

How this is being covered How these are calculated →

Article leaning vs. publisher reliability
Source leaning vs. consistency

Publisher

New York Post · 11332 article(s) · 32 correction(s) detected
Running correction rate · 32 correction(s)

Who wrote this

Dear Abby
24 article(s) here · 1 carrying a prediction
🔮 I told them immediately that I could not commit to — nor do I want — such a huge responsibility.
🔮 Her husband had left the country so he could renew his visa to come back and work.
🔮 I think they’re afraid that I will start hallucinating again and not have a support system there.
🔮 When I expressed concern, my husband laughed at me and told our son, “Mom is worried what others will think.”
🔮 It’s time to talk with a family law attorney about what your financial picture would look like if you were to divorce.
🔮 Even so, you will want to tread very carefully here.
🔮 This was never a problem for me when I was younger, but as I get older, I think it would be nice to have a party.
🔮 You can explain this until you’re blue in the face, but if your fiance feels that he, and not your daughter, should be your best friend, it will be like talking to a wall.
🔮 I was exhausted, so I went to bed around 8 p.m., but as I lay there, I couldn’t help thinking it might be time for me to move out or leave the relationship entirely.
🔮 Before I could finish, my son-in-law came in, told me I shouldn’t be talking about Libby’s weight and walked away.
Also by Dear Abby
Nothing else under this byline is closely related to this article, so these are simply their most recent.
All 24 articles by Dear Abby →

Topics

Dear Abby NEW YORK

Subjects

ABBY PERSON · 2× Abigail Van Buren PERSON · 1× Dear Abby ORG · 1× Jeanne Phillips PERSON · 1× Kansas City GPE · 1× NANNY PERSON · 1× NEW YORK GPE · 1× NO NANNY IN PERSON · 1× Pauline Phillips PERSON · 1×

Narrative

As for her hubby, he needs to understand that: 1. You are happy working with your father in the business, and 2. Removing garbage, clearing snow and dealing with mechanical issues are not remotely equivalent to devoting three days every week to taking care of a baby.
framing: assertive · carried by 1 article(s) · first seen 2026-10-18
🔮 I told them immediately that I could not commit to — nor do I want — such a huge responsibility.

Claims (28 extracted, 2 hedged)

My twin sister and her husband are expecting their first child. asserted
sister → expect → child
I run a small business with my father. asserted
I → run → father
Although I work hard, neither of them seems to see or acknowledge my efforts. asserted
neither → work → efforts
They consider me to be “sponging” off my father. asserted
me → consider → father
They also disapprove of my relationship with my boyfriend because we have chosen to remain unmarried and not have children, although we have been together as long as they have. asserted
they → disapprove → children
Recently, they offered to hire me as their nanny three days a week after my sister’s maternity leave is up so that they can continue working. asserted
they → offer → nanny
My sister also asked that I think it over without consulting my boyfriend. asserted
I → ask → boyfriend
I told them immediately that I could not commit to — nor do I want — such a huge responsibility. uncertain
I → tell → responsibility
I said I would help them when I could but that my life and schedule were too unpredictable to be their primary means of childcare. uncertain
life → say → childcare
This made my sister sad and disappointed and her husband angry. asserted
husband → make → ?
He will no longer speak to me and says he doesn’t understand why I couldn’t do them this “favor” after all the help with garbage, snow removal and mechanical issues he has selflessly given me (which is true). asserted
which → speak → me
Am I crazy to think that this seems a lot to ask of me and that I have a right to say no? asserted
I → think → right
Should I feel as guilty as they are making me feel? asserted
me → feel → ?
You are not “crazy,” so don’t feel guilty for refusing to allow your sister and brother-in-law to push you into something with which you are not comfortable. asserted
you → feel → which
That they would expect you to become their babysitter without first discussing it with your partner (legal or not) is somewhere between sneaky and presumptuous. asserted
you → expect → partner
You say your relationship with your twin and her husband is “somewhat strained.” asserted
relationship → say → twin
Well, it appears to be that way because you sense a lack of respect from them. asserted
you → appear → them
That is the issue you should straighten out with her. asserted
you → straighten → her
As for her hubby, he needs to understand that: 1. You are happy working with your father in the business, and 2. Removing garbage, clearing snow and dealing with mechanical issues are not remotely equivalent to devoting three days every week to taking care of a baby. asserted
Removing → need → baby
There is a great guy around my age who works at a nearby restaurant. asserted
who → be → restaurant
I really want to meet him, but he doesn’t seem too thrilled when women hit on him, and he doesn’t seem to date or have relationships at all. asserted
he → want → relationships
I heard he was recently seen flirting with a co-worker. asserted
he → hear → worker
How should I approach him? asserted
I → approach → him
— LOOKING FOR A WAY IN DEAR LOOKING: You should not approach him. asserted
You → look → him
Attractive service industry workers get a lot of unwanted attention, and you already know that this man does not welcome the amorous advances of his customers. asserted
man → get → customers
His romantic life is none of your business, so please stop poking around and move on. asserted
life → stop → business
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren. asserted
Abby → write → Buren
For nearly four decades, Jeanne Phillips penned this column, which was founded in 1956 by her mother, Pauline Phillips. asserted
which → pen → mother
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