For when the history books come to be written, Nigel Farage will go down as one of the century’s unluckiest politicians.
asserted
Farage → come → politicians
All he has ever wanted is a better Britain.
asserted
he → want → ?
A country united in a shared vision where everyone gets along with one another.
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everyone → unite → one
Where people of all faiths and none look out for each other.
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people → look → other
Where men and women of all colours are treated as equals.
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men → treat → equals
Where Nige can teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.
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Nige → teach → harmony
So why do so many bad things keep happening to such a good person?
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things → keep → person
Where’s the justice in that?
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justice → ’ → that
How come Nige has been given a lead role in the rewrite of Little Britain’s Book of Job.
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Nige → come → Job
Nige as a latter day Old Testament prophet put on Earth to show us all the value of eternal suffering.
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Nige → put → suffering
And yet time and again he is made to feel pain.
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he → make → pain
Few would have batted an eyelid if he had been given £5m by the RNLI.
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he → bat → RNLI
For all he has done to support the work that unpaid volunteers do in rescuing all people in trouble on the sea.
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volunteers → do → sea
Let’s face it, a modern day ministry doesn’t pay for itself and no demigod-like politician can expect to get by on less than £1m
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politician → face → 1
Those houses and bottles of champagne aren’t going to pay for themselves.
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houses → go → themselves
Yet because the £5m came from a Thai crypto-billionaire, suddenly everyone was asking difficult questions.
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everyone → come → questions
Anyone would think Reform might have crypto-friendly policies.
uncertain
Reform → think → policies
Compared to Nige, Jesus had it easy in Holy Week.
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it → compare → Week
How could he be expected to realise that two associates whom he had barely known for years might allegedly be trying to secure an illegal donation from overseas?
uncertain
he → expect → donation
And what were the chances that Nige might be caught on camera giving considered responses as part of a conversation he hadn’t even been listening to?
uncertain
he → catch → conversation
Some days you just can’t buy a break.
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you → buy → break
On Thursday morning, Farage had been scheduled to host a press conference near Southend where we were promised he would spread goodwill to all men with yet another major policy announcement.
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he → schedule → announcement
Only for the event to be cancelled late on Wednesday evening.
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event → cancel → evening
The official reason given was that Reform didn’t want to clash with the fifth anniversary of the murder of the former Southend MP David Amess.
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Reform → give → MP
One related to another sting, this time by ITV, that had sent undercover journalists into the Reform operations room and uncovered the only bad apples in the entire organisation.
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that → relate → organisation
Again, what were the chances of finding racists and misogynists attracted to a party that loved women and people of all colours?
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that → find → colours
How could this ever have happened?
uncertain
this → happen → ?
The chances were slimmer than winning the EuroMillions lottery.
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chances → win → lottery
And surely had nothing to do with Nige’s would-be chancellor, Honest Bob Jenrick, saying he would consider allowing soldiers to be able to blow up migrants in small boats in the Channel.
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soldiers → have → Channel
What’s wrong with killing a few thousand people for the sake of a greater good?
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What → ’ → good
Then there’s the wannabe home secretary Zia Yusuf, who is on a one-man mission to round up all immigrants – even women and children – and send them back to countries where they may be killed.
uncertain
they → ’ → countries
So again we are left with the question.
asserted
we → leave → question
Why are so many racists attracted to Reform?
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racists → attract → Reform
Let’s take Dean Miller.
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’s → take → Miller
A vetted Reform councillor from Bromley who was filmed campaigning during the Makerfield byelection.
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who → vet → byelection
I just don’t want them anywhere near me.”
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I → want → me
“That’s great.
asserted
That → ’ → ?
Anyway, Dean was caught on camera saying that it was kill or be killed with illegal immigrants.
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it → catch → immigrants
“They’re all fucking black and they’re like animals,” he said.
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he → ’re → animals
“I’m not a racist, but you know what I mean.”
asserted
I → ’m → what
…and 26 more, not listed.
The Aporia
