How much does it cost to buy thousands of live crickets?
asserted
it → cost → crickets
Maybe I’ll ask Brad Paisley.
asserted
I → ask → Paisley
The country singer introduced Taylor Swift this week as she was inducted into the Nashville Songwriters Hall of Fame.
asserted
she → introduce → Fame
Swift’s speech began with a playful nod to her friend.
asserted
speech → begin → friend
“I’m really surprised to see you here, actually, because we’ve been estranged since 2007,” she told him, before explaining to the audience.
asserted
she → ’m → audience
“He took a tour prank too far.
asserted
He → take → prank
I considered buying a pet lizard to eradicate the problem.”
asserted
I → consider → problem
It’s weird to think Ms. Swift might now own a bearded dragon named Dwight Schrute that has 50 million followers on Instagram.
uncertain
that → ’ → Instagram
Why did Paisley think it would be hilarious to turn a 17-year-old’s tour bus into a mobile insectarium?
asserted
it → think → insectarium
Didn’t he also once hide raw chicken inside Blake Shelton’s ride until the mystery stench overwhelmed the crew?
asserted
stench → hide → crew
Celebrity pranks are not limited to the road.
asserted
pranks → limit → road
Did Paris Hilton really once believe she was going to die in a plane crash over Dubai in what was actually an episode of an Egyptian hidden camera show?
asserted
what → believe → show
A couple of years ago, Glen Powell was a passenger as Tom Cruise piloted a helicopter and pretended to lose control.
asserted
Cruise → pilot → control
As Powell later recalled to British GQ: “Tom goes, ‘Oh no, oh no,’ and he starts dropping the helicopter over London.
asserted
he → recall → London
I was like, ‘Am I about to be the unnamed guy that dies with Tom in a smoking hole in the middle of London?’”
asserted
that → die → London
It’s only a matter of time until an extreme celebrity prank goes horribly wrong.
asserted
prank → ’ → time
Ellen DeGeneres once triggered Kim Kardashian, a glam arachnophobe, to have a panic attack during an interview by threatening to throw a spider at her.
asserted
DeGeneres → trigger → her
She jumped from the talk show couch and bolted for the exit.
asserted
She → jump → exit
Why did Channing Tatum think it would be hilarious to urinate on Amanda Seyfried?
asserted
it → think → Seyfried
Who spiked the lobster chowder on the set of “Titanic” with PCP?
asserted
Who → spike → PCP
What did Kieran Culkin expect when he covertly switched a prop joint Mark Ruffalo was to smoke in a stage play with real weed?
asserted
Ruffalo → expect → weed
Why did Johnny Depp leap out from behind a car with a shotgun loaded with blanks and “fire” upon Don Johnson’s startled assistant, who promptly wet his pants and quit his job?
asserted
who → leap → job
Rose Leslie could have suffered cardiac arrest that time she opened her fridge to find a decapitated head of fiancé Kit Harington he borrowed from the set of “Game of Thrones.”
uncertain
he → suffer → Thrones
Zach Braff once physically assaulted a 12-year-old actor on “Punk’d,” believing the kid had just spray-painted his Porsche.
asserted
kid → assault → Porsche
As a producer later told me, much of that sequence never aired.
asserted
much → tell → sequence
In the first episode of MTV’s gonzo program, Justin Timberlake was tricked into believing he owed the government nearly a million in back taxes.
asserted
he → trick → taxes
Fake agents repossessed his belongings, including his dogs.
asserted
agents → repossess → dogs
Timberlake, already paranoid and high on cannabis, was filmed weeping on his porch.
asserted
Timberlake → film → porch
It’s a good thing for all involved he wasn’t armed and on bath salts.
asserted
he → ’ → salts
This is why I always preferred the sweet and silent goofs on “Just For Laughs Gags.”
asserted
I → prefer → Gags
There is no chance one of those pranks will lead to a stabbing or heart failure.
asserted
one → be → stabbing
And, yet, the show still works as an exercise in deception and trickery.
asserted
show → work → deception
As the creator Pierre Girard once told me: “The main thing is we play with the real feelings of people.
asserted
we → tell → people
In any culture, in any country, people recognize themselves in those gags.”
asserted
people → recognize → gags
As I sit here typing in my office, worried Brad Paisley placed scorpions under the desk, I’m still struggling with the central question.
asserted
I → sit → question
Maybe you can help.
asserted
you → help → ?
As a species, why do we love fooling others?
asserted
we → love → others
Why did the Romans hand out fake wills?
asserted
Romans → hand → wills
What explains The Bottle Conjuror of 1749 or The Spaghetti Tree Hoax of 1957?
asserted
What → explain → 1957
Why do we devote a calendar day to April Fools?
asserted
we → devote → Fools
…and 8 more, not listed.
The Aporia
