Our dear friends the Duke and Duchess of Sussex have been back in the UK for almost 50 days but already it seems like a century – if not two.
asserted
it → seem → century
Did you think they were going to keep a polite and deferential low profile in respect of King and country?
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they → think → King
Let’s be frank.
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’s → let → ?
Re-Megxit has been chaos, a family uprooting that seemed wild and capricious from the get-go.
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that → seem → go
‘For us, when certain stars align, and it’s clear that this should or probably will end up being the case, then we lean into that,’ Prince Harry blathered to GQ magazine this week, explaining why he shifted continents and moved his family back from California to the Cotswolds on what seemed to be a whim long divulged to no one, least of all his father.
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what → align → all
Stars align?
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Stars → align → ?
Harry sounds like a tweenie journaling his feels in a shiny pink diary and sucking the end of a glitter pen because he doesn’t know how to spell ‘genetic pain’ properly.
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he → sound → pain
To date, the couple went to a pub, the Prince got booed at a rugby match, the children had to change schools, the Duchess launched a range of chocolates that cost £5 each and we all went to Nottingham for a performative charity meet and greet to keep up royal appearances.
At a foodbank in the city, Meghan was coming on strong, acting like Scarlett O’Hara handing out silk kerchiefs to her servants at Tara as she helped pack tins of food into plastic bags.
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she → go → bags
She was talking and asking a lot of questions to show her bountiful concern, it was really a beautiful moment.
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it → talk → concern
Are these baked beans individually wrapped?
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beans → bake → ?
Is it easy to chunk a pineapple?
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it → chunk → pineapple
I love Tesco, it’s always been my favourite opera.
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it → love → Tesco
Please, allow me to donate a morning’s jam profits to the local Chimney Sweep Society.
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me → allow → Society
Here are six packets of my flower sprinkles to give to those who have nothing.
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who → give → nothing
When you say just put a tin in the bag and move on, what exactly do you mean?
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you → say → what
‘For us, when certain stars align, and it’s clear that this should or probably will end up being the case, then we lean into that,’ Prince Harry blathered to GQ magazine this week
Our dear friends the Duke and Duchess of Sussex have been back in the UK for almost 50 days but already it seems like a century – if not two, writes Jan Moir
Meanwhile, Harry gave a grief masterclass online which included a section called ‘Turn Pain Into Profit’.
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which → align → Profit
We all know that our boy has been giving the world a masterclass in grief for most of his adult life and many are heartily sick of it, particularly since mentions of his mother Diana are increasing exponentially as the 30th anniversary of her death approaches.
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anniversary → know → death
No one would argue that it is not a tragedy and a sadness that a boy lost his mother when he was only 12 years old.
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he → argue → mother
Yet, without diminishing anyone’s sorrow, isn’t it also true to say that bereavement is survivable – and the only way through the unbearable is to bear it as best you can.
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you → diminish → it
‘I’ve done different forms of therapy and I put in the work,’ Harry said this week.
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Harry → do → work
It was very revealing, just not in the way he likely imagined.
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he → imagine → way
Harry stated that he wants reconciliation with his family because life is too short, then seemed to blame someone – Prince William, Sooty, Shergar, Prince William, Scooby Doo, Simba, Prince William, take your pick – before later insisting he meant nothing of the sort.
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he → state → sort
If Harry cannot make himself clear in these interviews, he shouldn’t be doing them.
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he → make → them
Here he revelled in presenting himself as the injured party trying to make peace with his family, yet there is never any talk of reconciliation with Thomas Markle is there?
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he → revel → Markle
Harry stated that he wants reconciliation with his family, including his brother William, because life is too short
Think about that, the next time you see Harry and Meghan hugging strangers and acting like God’s greatest gift to the world of charity.
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Harry → state → charity
Harry also talked about his fight with the British Press and how he wants to protect journalists.
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he → talk → journalists
This came as a shock to many of my colleagues, whom he falsely accused of gross misconduct in his recent court case against this newspaper.
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he → come → newspaper
He and his co-defendants comprehensively lost and now face legal bills in the millions.
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He → lose → millions
But instead of being embarrassed or ashamed or even apologising, Harry is incorrigible, deluded and obsessed.
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Harry → apologise → ?
He ran away from England, he is a loser in court and had few successes in America.
One of the main reasons he has returned is because – like a salmon swimming upstream to spawn – he has a need, an elitist’s desire to have his children educated at the same kind of exclusive, expensive establishments with selective admission policies which he himself attended.
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he → run → which
He may claim to hate tradition and the Establishment but, at heart, he’s just another posh drone.
uncertain
he → claim → heart
Meghan, with her sprinkles and faux bonhomie, is hard enough to bear but Prince Harry is far worse.
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Harry → bear → sprinkles
He has notions.
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He → have → notions
What Re-Megxit has proved beyond doubt is that he sees himself as a hero who is both righteous and wronged, as both crusader and victim, as a man who is above reproach and beneath the dignity of accountability.
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who → prove → accountability
Now I understand why Prince William always looks so haunted, how the King keeps a careful distance, why courtiers pull down the portcullis at the mention of his name.
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courtiers → understand → name
For Harry is a one-man riot, a looter trying to smash and grab his way back into The Firm, convinced of the imperative and his self-appointed role as moral custodian and hero.
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Harry → try → custodian
He is just never going to stop until he gets his way.
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he → go → way
Girls need Curie & Co as role models
Marie Curie was the first person – not just the first woman – to win two Nobel Prizes.
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Curie → need → Prizes
She discovered radium and coined the word ‘radioactivity’.
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She → discover → word
When she was once asked how it felt to marry a genius, she replied: ‘Go and ask my husband.’
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she → ask → husband
…and 29 more, not listed.
The Aporia
