Nigella Lawson joining the cast of the Great British Bake Off is a spectacular coming together of two titanic British institutions, as if the royal family and the Spice Girls joined up to form a giant killer robot.
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family → join → robot
It’s almost surreal seeing Nigella take up her place in the tent: you feel she’s surely too big a deal to be a full-time baking judge.
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she → ’ → tent
Sure, you’ve seen her drop in to shows as a guest, but “guest” is the key word there: she comes in, brings everyone under her spell, and is away again, on the breeze, back to whatever mysterious woodland realm she rules as queen.
But here she is, on the new series of GBBO, filling the shoes previously occupied by Prue Leith and Mary Berry, and with the greatest respect to those two eminent ladies, the heat in the kitchen has definitely turned up a few notches.
Funnily enough, at the start of the new series the queen of sensuous cuisine seems almost shy.
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queen → see → cuisine
She doesn’t say much early on, leaving her judging partner Paul Hollywood, the silver fox with the blue steel eyes and the tan of a man who has himself been baked at a moderate heat for 45 minutes, to do the bulk of the commentary.
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who → say → commentary
Every year GBBO looks out at a world riven by prejudice and hatred, divided into warring factions of humanity, and with the warmest smile and sweetest voice, says bollocks to that.
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GBBO → look → that
And of course, the comic relief comes from the ageless god of mischief, Noel Fielding, whose jumpers remain as astonishing as the fact that such a surreal comedic personality has thrived for so long on this bastion of middle-class patisserie.
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personality → come → patisserie
His co-host is Alison Hammond, who as always plays the part of the jolly Brummie who isn’t very funny but seems very nice.
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who → play → Brummie
Nigella warms to her task, though, and by midway through the episode is displaying that peculiar knack for conjuring foodie poetry that is but one part of her addictive appeal.
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that → warm → appeal
“Don’t let the sugar shout – let it sing!” she implores, and throughout the tent bakers weep, for they have never known such beauty ere now.
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they → let → beauty
Of course, this is a very long-running program, and it certainly isn’t reliant on a new big-name judge to make it worth watching.
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it → run → judge
GBBO has always thrived not just on its loveable judges and offbeat hosts, but more than anything on the diverse mix of contestants it summons forth each season.
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it → thrive → contestants
It’s the life-affirming part of the show: every year GBBO looks out at a world riven by prejudice and hatred, divided into warring factions of humanity, and with the warmest smile and sweetest voice, says bollocks to that.
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GBBO → ’ → that
Again, this year’s bunch run the gamut: men and women, young and old, LGBTQI and straight, Portuguese and Jamaican; they’ve got it all.
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they → run → it
And it’s not just diverse in outward identity markers – the range of personalities is wide and rich, from dynamo Molly, who rolls round the kitchen in a wheelchair with a smile that seems utterly invincible, even when catastrophe strikes; to shy youngster Mo, full of earnest nerves but all the more loveable when joy does break out on his face; to Gabe, who lives in a throuple and works as a drag queen; to Danni, a Dorset sprite who immediately commands centre stage with an irrepressible joie de vivre that puts one in mind of the heroine of a children’s book series about a feisty pixie who leads woodland animals in a campaign of pranks against a grouchy farmer.
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who → ’ → farmer
Plus there’s sweet, modest Gary, quick-witted Tom, and Clara, who one could easily imagine flirting with James Bond while trying to assassinate him.
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one → ’ → him
On and on it goes, and
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it → go → ?
the wonderful thing is that for all the variety among the group, even in the first episode they all seem to be BFFs.
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they → seem → episode
Hugging and cheering each other on, commiserating when, inevitably, as famous baker WB Yeats said, things fall apart: the vibes in the GBBO tent are so beautifully comradely they make the average MasterChef cast look like a clan of warring chimpanzees.
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cast → hug → chimpanzees
Along with the beautiful cakes, pies and pastries on display, the ability to keep bringing such diverse casts together in love and friendship has always been GBBO’s greatest ingredient, making it such a powerfully feelgood show that it can get away with wacky opening skits that on any other show would be unbearably naff.
But one has to admit that having Nigella there has elevated the GBBO to yet another level.
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having → keep → level
For to gaze into the eyes of Nigella, to watch her down a mouthful of stout cake and speak softly of buttercream and walnuts, is to become immediately entranced.
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gaze → gaze → buttercream
Watch it if: You like delicious cakes, lovely people you wish were your friends, and a cooking-show empress with perfect diction.
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you → watch → diction
Don’t watch it if: You hate joy or beauty.
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You → watch → joy
Sizzle rating: Five burners – SIZZLING
Great British Bake Off Season 17 is streaming now on Binge
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Season → stream → Binge
The Aporia
