Donald Trump seems to spend an unusual amount of time thinking about toilets.
asserted
Trump → seem → toilets
Back in 2019, he bizarrely claimed: “People are flushing toilets 10 times, 15 times as opposed to once.”
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People → claim → toilets
He repeated this claim at a Michigan rally the following year.
uncertain
He → repeat → rally
“Ten times, right, 10 times,” Trump complained.
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Trump → complain → ?
“Not me, of course not me, but you,” he added while pointing at an unfortunate audience member.
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he → add → member
A couple of years later, he was back to the toilet talk: angrily disputing claims by the New York Times reporter Maggie Haberman that he’d once clogged a White House toilet by attempting to dispose of documents in it.
uncertain
he → dispute → it
I regret to inform you that the president is once again responsible for a national conversation about toilets.
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president → regret → toilets
In a fitting encapsulation of Trumpism, explosive diarrhea has become a midterm talking point.
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diarrhea → become → Trumpism
Food recalls and stomach-churning parasites have been a mainstay of the news this year and Democrats are milking the issue.
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Democrats → churn → issue
In August, for example, the Democratic party’s official Twitter/X account highlighted the number of foods that have been recalled in 2026 and demanded that RFK Jr resign from his role as health secretary.
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Jr → highlight → secretary
Last month (which happened to be Food Safety Month – who knew?), the Rhode Island congressman Gabe Amo argued that Trump’s cuts to the federal workforce had contributed to decreased food safety.
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cuts → happen → safety
The senator Elizabeth Warren similarly accused “slashed food safety agencies” of contributing to the “cyclospora outbreak” and demanded Trump be held accountable in November.
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Trump → accuse → November
The US only recently declared the end of the largest ever recorded cyclosporiasis outbreak, which was linked to contaminated lettuce.
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which → declare → lettuce
That resulted in 570 hospitalizations and two deaths.
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That → result → hospitalizations
Also different is the fact that, as Warren noted, the Trump administration seems hellbent on dismantling the regulations and systems that help keep consumers safe.
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that → note → consumers
Ever since 1995, there has been a federal-state partnership called the Foodborne Diseases Active Surveillance Network (FoodNet) which tracks infections caused by various pathogens, including Cyclospora.
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which → call → Cyclospora
Starting on 1 July, however, the CDC downgraded this program so that mandatory surveillance for the 10 state health departments that participate in the program was limited to Salmonella and E Coli.
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that → start → Salmonella
This downgrading of pathogen surveillance didn’t cause the Cyclospora outbreak, but it might have made it harder for health authorities to respond to it.
uncertain
authorities → cause → it
And it’s not just food that the current administration is making less safe: the air we breathe and the water we drink are all getting more dangerous in the name of maximizing corporate profits.
On Monday, for example, the Trump administration announced it was relaxing rules that govern how fuel-efficient auto companies have to make their new gasoline-powered cars and light trucks.
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companies → ’ → cars
The rationale given by Sean Duffy, the reality show star turned transportation secretary, is that removing stringent pollution-control requirements will reduce the average costs of new vehicles by $1,300.
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removing → give → 1,300
We’ll see if that actually happens (corporations are not keen on passing on cost savings), but even if it does reduce car prices, it’s going to cost consumers and the environment in other ways.
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it → see → ways
Reduced efficiency will increase fuel spending, for one thing.
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efficiency → reduce → thing
And the change is poised to create more air pollution and worsen climate change.
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change → poise → change
The Trump administration is also working to roll back regulation of toxic air pollutants.
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administration → work → pollutants
Earlier this year the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) proposed weakening air pollution limits on ethylene oxide (EtO), a known carcinogen that is used to clean medical devices.
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that → propose → devices
A Biden-era rule finalized in 2024 required stringent testing for hazardous emissions and required emitters to cut the amount of EtO they were producing.
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they → finalize → EtO
If the EPA is successful in overturning these rules, then tons of the carcinogenic gas will continue to be released into the community.
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tons → overturn → community
And it’s obviously not people in the vicinity of Mar-a-Lago breathing in the brunt of this poisonous air, is it?
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it → ’ → air
It’s people in largely low-income neighborhoods.
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It → ’ → neighborhoods
A Biden-era rule set drinking-water limits for several Pfas (commonly known as “forever chemicals”).
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rule → set → chemicals
You know what happened next, don’t you?
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you → know → ?
The Trump administration is trying to roll back those limits, arguing that the standards are expensive and legally flawed.
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standards → try → limits
They’ve also terminated a regulatory review of Pfas-contaminated sewage sludge fertilizer that is used on farmland.
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that → terminate → farmland
What does that mean?
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that → mean → What
Well, according to comments submitted by the Southern Environmental Law Center to the EPA, “if PFOA levels are 9.4 parts per billion [as witnessed in sludge tested in Maine], then more than 54 children out of 10,000 who eat 1-2 meals of fish per week on crop farms could get cancer later in life from those meals alone.
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who → accord → meals
In short: if you thought the diarrhea-inducing lettuce was bad, then I’m afraid things only look likely to get worse.
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things → think → ?
If Trump isn’t reined in at the midterms, the whole country is going down the toilet.
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country → rein → toilet
The Aporia
