That is 0 articles you have read today.
The Aporia is free and carries no advertising, so readers are the only
thing paying for it. If you are getting this much out of it, a small
donation is what keeps it independent.
Daily limit reached
You have read 0 articles today.
That is more than the 15 a day The Aporia gives away,
and well past what it can carry on nothing. Your allowance resets at
midnight.
There is no advertising here and nothing about you is sold, so readers
are the only thing paying for it. If the site is worth this much of
your day, it is worth a few dollars.
Everything else stays open: the
maps, the
directory and
search do
not count against this, and neither does re-opening something you have
already read today.
Cyrena Anne Quast, 35, from Saint Cloud, Minnesota, was arrested on August 30 for stealing batteries worth approximately $580 from a store in Monticello. The arrest gained significant attention due to her strong resemblance to Jennifer Lopez, leading to widespread online commentary and memes comparing the two. While Quast admitted to the theft, the focus of the viral coverage has been her likeness to the pop star rather than the crime itself.
Written by the local model on 2026-09-17,
using this article's own text rather than the other coverage of the
same event (that is the story summary below).
Story summary
Cyrena Anne Quast, a 35-year-old woman from Monticello, Minnesota, was arrested on August 30 for allegedly stealing two double packs of power tool batteries worth approximately $578-$580 from a local store. The incident led to her mugshot being taken by the Wright County Sheriff's Office and going viral due to her striking resemblance to Jennifer Lopez. Internet users joked about mistaking Quast for J.Lo, with some even playfully rewriting lyrics of popular songs in reference to this likeness. Beyond the celebrity look-alike angle, Quast has a lengthy criminal history dating back to 2011, including arrests for drug possession, DWI, fleeing police, providing false identification, and multiple traffic infractions.
Written for “Viral Mugshot Resembling Celebrity” on 2026-09-17,
grounded in this article and the 1 other(s) covering the same event.
A Minnesota woman has gone viral online for her shoplifting arrest mugshot, which bears an uncanny resemblance to chart-topper Jennifer Lopez.
asserted
which → go → Lopez
Cyrena Anne Quast, 35, was arrested on Aug. 30 after she was accused of stealing two double packs of power tool batteries worth around $580 from a store in Monticello, according to a criminal complaint obtained by The Watch MN.
uncertain
she → arrest → MN
A store employee reportedly recognized the Saint Cloud native from an alleged theft two days earlier and called the cops.
uncertain
employee → recognize → cops
Quast reportedly admitted to swiping the battery packs and was booked on a gross misdemeanor theft charge, online arrest listings show.
uncertain
listings → admit → charge
But her alleged sticky fingers isn’t what’s being talked about.
asserted
what → allege → ?
Quast’s striking resemblance to the 57-year-old international superstar in her mugshot taken by the Wright County Sheriff’s Office has drawn massive attention online.
asserted
resemblance → take → attention
“For a moment I thought it was jlo lmao,” one user quipped, while another joked, “There’s a glitch in the matrix lol.”
asserted
another → think → matrix
Other users put a spin on the lyrics of Lopez’s iconic 2002 hit “Jenny from the Block” in comment sections where Lopez’s doppelgänger’s mugshot has been shared.
asserted
mugshot → put → sections
“In prison she’s known as Jenny from D-Block!,” while another snarked, “Jenny been walking the block too much.”
asserted
Jenny → know → block
“She’s definitely still Jenny from the block.
asserted
She → ’ → block
“JENNIFER IF YOU DONT COME CLAIM YOUR SISTER RIGHT NEEOWWWWWWWW & DO THIS DNA TESTTTT.
uncertain
YOU → come → TESTTTT
dis yo sistaaaaa gurlllllllllll,” another user joked.
asserted
user → dis → ?
Quast was released the day after her Aug. 30 arrest, the Daily Mail reported.
asserted
Mail → release → arrest
Online records indicate her arrest last month wasn’t her first run-in with the law.
asserted
arrest → indicate → law
The J.Lo-look-alike has previously been arrested for a slew of prior offences, including drug possession, DWI, fleeing police and providing false identification in addition to several traffic infractions, records show.
asserted
records → look → infractions