You may have thought it was a headline from the Babylon Bee: Hunter Biden Honored for “Outstanding Contribution to Public Discourse” from prestigious Trinity College Dublin.
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Biden → think → Dublin
Hunter Biden, the 56-year-old reformed crack and prostitute connoisseur of “Laptop from Hell” fame, visited his ancestral land to be so honored on Tuesday, accompanied by his suddenly compos mentis father, Joe, the former president.
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Biden → reform → father
A Secret Service cavalcade of seven vehicles chauffeured Hunter and Joe to the university from Dublin’s finest five-star luxury Merrion hotel.
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cavalcade → chauffeur → hotel
We were told that Joe wiped tears from his eyes as his son, fully dressed, accepted Trinity’s gold medal for contributions to society amid glowing accolades from Irish Prime Minister Micheál Martin, who posted photos of their meeting on social media.
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who → tell → media
Jesus wept.
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Jesus → weep → ?
You will be seeing a lot more such gaslighting historical rewrites in coming weeks as Joe’s latest memoir, “Promise Me, America,” is published next Tuesday.
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memoir → see → Me
You have to hand it to wily old Joe: the 83-year-old still knows how to garner positive press coverage.
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old → have → coverage
Unlike President Trump, he confines his utterances to gushingly friendly media, like People magazine, even when he’s supposed to be selling a book for which he received a $10 million advance.
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he → confine → advance
On Sunday, he used his stage 4 cancer diagnosis to excuse himself from additional promotional events for the book.
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he → use → book
In one of his more mind-blowing exchanges with People, Joe said that the disastrously addled debate performance that ended his bid for re-election in 2024 was “not very consequential . . .
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that → blow → 2024
I don’t know anybody who hasn’t made a mistake in a debate.”
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who → know → debate
‘I wasn’t hiding’
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I → hide → ?
As for his health, he’s no longer at death’s door, apparently: “It looks very positive.
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It → ’ → door
There’s a lot of people who’ve been diagnosed with cancer, particularly the kind of cancer I have, who live long lives, who live for another 10, 20 years . . .
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who → ’ → years
“I’m not saying I’ll live forever but the point is that I have all my faculties.
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I → say → faculties
See how smoothly he wipes away the memory of the cognitive impairment that we all saw accelerate throughout his presidency.
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we → see → presidency
He will carefully curate future appearances so that all that is left is the Biden myth of a decent and honest family man who was a good and consequential president and whose sole failing was a cancer that was diagnosed conveniently only after he was pushed aside and the knives started to come out.
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knives → curate → man
Lest you scoff, he has the timing covered too, describing in his book a “cynical twist” on his cancer diagnosis, in which he was accused of hiding it so he could keep running for re-election.
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he → scoff → election
“A lot of people do that.
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lot → do → that
They hide bad news from the public if they’re elected officials.
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they → hide → public
I didn’t do that . . . I wasn’t hiding it at all.”
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I → do → it
Joe would never lie.
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Joe → lie → ?
He has “more moral and physical courage than most people I know.”
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I → have → people
People happened to be at the Biden family’s “lake house” compound in Greenville, Del., two days after the midterm election.
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People → happen → election
“I don’t think the election could have gone any better,” he said in a video excerpt of the interview.
“I was very happy.
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I → think → interview
I wasn’t all that surprised really . . . but I was really pleased that the American people [didn’t] fall for the bravado of the Republican leadership and Trump in particular.”
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people → [ → leadership
She loves James Talarico.
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She → love → Talarico
“I do think, when history is written, the true story . . . of all [Joe’s] years in office [will be told],” she said, “and people will realize, not just what a great president he was, but what a great man he is.”
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he → think → was
Bold hypocrisy
Only if the Bidens brainwash all the historians, which is, of course, why Joe gathered so many pet leftist historical authors around him for intimate gatherings at the White House.
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Joe → brainwash → House
Jon Meacham, Doris Kearns Goodwin and Michael Beschloss were among those who murmured sweet nothings in Joe’s ear and told him he was the second coming of FDR.
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he → murmur → FDR
But history will have a very different take on Biden’s legacy, no matter how many lies are spun in this latest attempt to gloss his failed presidency.
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lies → have → presidency
Take his beef that Trump reversed the “successful policies pursued by my administration.”
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Trump → take → administration
In a book extract published this week by The Atlantic, Biden says the reversals happened because of the “dismissive and destructive nature of Donald Trump, who seemed unable to tolerate the idea that someone else’s accomplishments might be worth building on rather than tearing down.”
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accomplishments → publish → idea
This is hypocrisy so dishonest it takes your breath away.
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it → take → breath
Maybe Biden has forgotten who his predecessor was.
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predecessor → forget → ?
Biden did exactly to Trump what he complains Trump did to his asinine and destructive policies — and then some.
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Trump → do → policies
In his first 100 days, Biden signed more than 60 executive actions, of which 24 were “direct reversals of Trump policies,” CNN reported.
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CNN → sign → policies
Ten of his first 12 executive orders reversed Trump immigration measures.
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Ten → reverse → measures
Worse, Biden tried to erase Trump into the future, presiding over a censorship regime befitting China and weaponizing the DOJ, Kremlin-style, against Trump and his allies.
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Biden → try → Trump
He maliciously locked up hundreds of non-violent Trump supporters without trial over Jan. 6 and maligned half the country as “semi-fascist ultra-MAGA” in a series of angry, ranting speeches we have tried to forget.
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we → lock → speeches
…and 7 more, not listed.
The Aporia
