At the end of the 2021 season, the Cincinnati Bengals came up three points short in Super Bowl LVI against the Los Angeles Rams.
asserted
Bengals → come → Rams
Near the end of the 2022 season, the Bengals came up three points short – a 23-20 score line again in the AFC championship game against the Kansas City Chiefs.
asserted
Bengals → come → Chiefs
But from 2023 through 2025, those Bengals had to walk the desert for a while.
asserted
Bengals → have → while
Between injuries to quarterback Joe Burrow, an offensive line that was problematic at best, and one of the NFL’s worst defenses from year to year, Cincinnati had a combined regular-season record of 24-27, and no playoff appearances.
asserted
Cincinnati → have → 24
And Burrow is on a tear we’ve rarely seen from any quarterback.
asserted
we → see → quarterback
Over the last four weeks, his 16 touchdown passes is the most in a four-game span in Bengals history (which goes back to 1968).
asserted
which → go → 1968
He is the second quarterback in pro football history with 16 or more passing touchdowns and two or more rushing touchdowns in any four-game span, putting him up with Tom Brady in 2007 – the season in which the New England Patriots’ offense scored 36.8 points per game, and Brady was at his best.
asserted
Brady → put → best
Burrow has been pressured on just 30.2% of his dropbacks this season, as opposed to 33.8% in 2025 and 34.2% in 2024.
asserted
Burrow → pressure → 2024
When healthy, Burrow is as good as any quarterback you’ll see.
asserted
you → see → quarterback
At this moment, he’s better.
asserted
he → ’ → moment
Against a Falcons team ranked fifth in pass defense DVOA entering Sunday, Burrow completed 24 of 29 passes for 271 yards, three touchdowns, no interceptions and a passer rating of 140.1.
asserted
Burrow → rank → 140.1
The Falcons had no answers against Ja’Marr Chase and Tee Higgins, Burrow’s dynamic receiver duo, and unlike in previous seasons, Cincinnati’s defense is prepared to … if not match the offense’s efforts, at least hold things up.
asserted
defense → have → things
The Bengals are average on defense, but when you have an offense like this, that’s good enough.
asserted
that → have → this
The only time anyone was able to dim Burrow’s brightness was when the Bernabéu lights briefly went out in the fourth quarter.
asserted
lights → dim → quarter
Add in the fact that Cincinnati’s run game is nothing to write home about (their 3.87 yards per carry and minus-0.13 EPA per run are each among the league’s worst), and it’s clear that as much as any NFL player, Burrow will be required to take his team as far as they can go.
asserted
they → add → team
That’s good news for the Bengals, because Burrow has traveled to the realms of the near-unstoppable.
asserted
Burrow → ’ → unstoppable
Burrow has never won the NFL MVP award.
asserted
Burrow → win → award
(He came in fourth in both 2022 and 2024 when Patrick Mahomes and Josh Allen won it, respectively.)
asserted
Mahomes → come → it
But at this rate, the trophy seems his to lose.
asserted
trophy → seem → rate
The Rams’ edge rusher had been out since Week 1 of the 2026 season with a knee injury, and in his return to action, per Pro Football Focus, he recorded three sacks, nine total pressures and a forced fumble in LA’s 20-13 win over the Washington Commanders.
asserted
he → record → Commanders
Garrett, of course, was supposed to be the centerpiece of the Rams’ dream team following a blockbuster trade with the Cleveland Browns, and his presence was desperately needed for a franchise that was just trying to get above .500 on the season.
asserted
that → suppose → season
Garrett did his level best for the now 5-4 Rams, and it wasn’t just that the sacks happened, it was when they happened.
asserted
they → do → Rams
Garrett’s first sack came with 2:20 left in the first half and the Commanders up 10-3.
asserted
Commanders → come → half
That was the forced fumble, recovered by linebacker Omar Speights.
asserted
That → force → Speights
That led to a Rams drive that ended with a field goal at the end of the half.
asserted
that → lead → half
The second and third sacks came in the fourth quarter as the Rams were trying to hold their 20-13 lead.
asserted
Rams → come → lead
The Rams are no longer in that dream team conversation, but maybe they can at least ride the wave to a playoff berth.
asserted
they → ride → berth
If Puka Nacua can stay healthy, that is.
asserted
that → stay → ?
Nacua, the Rams’ top receiver, caught 14 passes on 19 targets for 150 yards and a touchdown in the win, but also suffered a knee injury that may keep him out for a while.
uncertain
that → catch → while
Video of the week
Nico Collins of the Houston Texans is easily one of the NFL’s best X-iso receivers, which means that he can line up against the opponent’s best cornerback in one-on-one situations, and what would usually be a 50-50 contested catch turns into 90-10 in Collins’ favor because of his skillset.
asserted
be → mean → skillset
Collins made that abundantly clear with 8:16 left in the third quarter of Houston’s 44-22 win over the beleaguered 0-8 Los Angeles Chargers.
asserted
8:16 → make → Chargers
Texans quarterback CJ Stroud threw to Collins, but Still seemed to have this ball at least deflected, if not outright intercepted.
asserted
ball → throw → Collins
Collins caught four passes on four targets for 55 yards and a touchdown, and the touchdown was certainly the catch of the day.
asserted
touchdown → catch → day
The corgi race during halftime of the Denver Broncos’ 26-21 win over the Carolina Panthers at Bank of America Stadium in Charlotte, North Carolina, took an interesting turn, as Lennox the Corgi went rogue from the vertical race path and decided instead to become a canine Barry Sanders.
asserted
Lennox → take → path
By our estimation, Lennox evaded seven attempted tackles, and even stopped to ask his pursuers at one point, “Are we playing or what?”
asserted
we → evade → point
With such lateral juice, contact balance, and swagger, Lennox could have a bright future ahead of him.
uncertain
Lennox → have → him
With 26 seconds left in the first half of the New York Giants’ 19-11 win over the Philadelphia Eagles, Philly punter Braden Mann booted the ball from his own eight-yard line to the New York six-yard line.
asserted
Mann → leave → line
That was an 86-yard punt, which tied for the seventh-longest in pro football history.
asserted
which → tie → history
However … with 6:53 left in the game, Mann fumbled the center snap, and had a punt of minus-two yards.
asserted
Mann → leave → yards
It is, of course, the only time in a game that a punter had one punt of more than 80 yards and another with negative yardage.
asserted
punter → have → yardage
…and 25 more, not listed.
The Aporia
