My ears perked up when I heard Apple’s new foldable phones were cracking.
asserted
phones → perk → ?
I licked my lips when the company announced it’s releasing a touch-screen laptop.
asserted
it → lick → laptop
This was a company that once charged $19 for a polishing cloth, asked $200 for a VESA mount, and sold $700 wheels for the Mac Pro.
asserted
that → charge → Pro
Now it’s borrowing tired ideas from its competitors and launching hardware its previous leaders rejected.
asserted
leaders → borrow → hardware
The once dominant company is struggling to find its feet in an AI-driven post-Tim Cook world.
asserted
company → struggle → world
John Ternus is the new CEO — a 25 year veteran of the company with a track record of pushing harebrained hardware schemes like the much reviled Touch Bar and lawsuit inducing butterfly keyboard.
asserted
Ternus → push → Bar
With Ternus at the helm, I feel there’s a good chance Apple’s best days are behind it, that it will have to make do with less, that it’s déclassé.
asserted
it → feel → less
Apple, blindsided by AI and relying on crowdpleasing hardware gimmicks, is downwardly mobile.
asserted
Apple → blindside → gimmicks
It’s in its slop era.
asserted
It → ’ → era
The company that once asked consumers to “Think Different” is now releasing hardware that’s just like everything else on the market.
asserted
that → ask → market
Apple is not adjusting to this new position well.
asserted
Apple → adjust → position
AI boosters agree that Siri AI is awful.
asserted
AI → agree → ?
Apple HomeView is a $300 Apple Watch meant to replace the family hearth.
asserted
HomeView → mean → hearth
The iPhone Duo has only been out for a few days and all people can talk about is the cracks, yet Ternus is on the cover of Time Magazine this week holding the folding iPhone Duo and staring at the camera.
asserted
Ternus → talk → camera
“The other examples in the world felt kind of cheap and crappy,” Ternus told Time.
asserted
Ternus → feel → Time
Many people holding cracked iPhone Duos this week are learning just what (not) cheap and crappy looks like.
asserted
cheap → hold → what
Flailing from crackgate, Apple announced the launch of a touch-screen laptop, an idea Steve Jobs extensively tested and said “doesn’t work,” an idea Cook once compared to combining a toaster with a refrigerator.
asserted
Cook → flail → refrigerator
What’s next?
asserted
What → ’ → ?
What if the toaster-refigerator folded?
asserted
refigerator → fold → ?
Ternus has been trying to make an 18-inch foldable iPad happen for years.
asserted
iPad → try → years
Maybe Apple will solve the screen cracking issues by then.
asserted
Apple → solve → issues
Or maybe Ternus will continue to try to put a hat on a hat.
asserted
Ternus → continue → hat
I have been waiting for this moment for more than a decade.
asserted
I → wait → decade
I am relishing Apple’s recent trajectory more than I should.
asserted
I → relish → trajectory
I confess I harbor a secret and petty grudge.
asserted
I → confes → grudge
In 2010, when Apple released the iPhone 4 I was working as a floor manager at a Banana Republic in Dallas.
asserted
I → release → Dallas
I made do with my Motorola Razr.
asserted
I → do → Razr
But the suit-wearing middle management retail psychopaths that were my coworkers saw my lack of an iPhone as a weakness.
asserted
that → wear → weakness
It was not, as they say now, On Brand.
asserted
they → say → Brand
I had started at the store in the stock room, working my way up to manage the backroom before ascending to a coveted position on the sales floor.
asserted
I → start → floor
The other managers made it clear that a Razr was a “backroom” phone and someone in a prominent position on the floor needed to be seen using an iPhone.
asserted
someone → make → iPhone
At first, I was not told to buy an iPhone.
asserted
I → tell → iPhone
The message came in the form of subtle and not so subtle bullying deployed over weeks.
asserted
message → come → weeks
“Still using that old phone?” they’d say.“Didn’t you get a raise?” someone would ask a week later.
asserted
someone → use → raise
“Try not to use that thing on the sales floor,” one co-worker told me, pointing at my Razr.
asserted
worker → try → Razr
“We’re trying to project a certain image here.”
The social pressure had the opposite of its intended effect.
asserted
pressure → try → effect
I resisted.
asserted
I → resist → ?
Eventually one of the friendlier managers pulled me aside.
asserted
one → pull → me
He told me that my colleagues thought it was weird that I didn't have an iPhone.
asserted
I → tell → iPhone
He said I needed to buy one to fit in and he said the store could give me an advance on my paycheck to make it happen.
uncertain
it → say → paycheck
…and 7 more, not listed.
The Aporia
