It's Dwarfism Awareness Month, which means as a person with this physical condition, October is all about me (not really — it's about everyone like me!).
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it → mean → me
It's also a chance to raise awareness about what it's like being short statured.
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it → raise → what
I often find people ask me the same questions or are perhaps hesitant to ask in case I get offended.
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I → find → questions
So, to improve acceptance and an understanding, here are five of the most common questions I'm asked — with my honest answers.
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I → improve → answers
I often get asked this by kids.
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I → ask → kids
I don't mind because they're naturally curious.
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they → mind → ?
But it can get tiring having to explain this so many different times.
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it → get → this
I wish parents and educators would take more of a proactive approach towards teaching kids about difference.
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parents → wish → difference
I explain that I was born a bit differently, and the kids are usually satisfied and bored to the point where we move on to chatting about something else.
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we → explain → something
I don't usually get asked this by adults.
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I → ask → adults
Perhaps there's also a level of understanding about difference or they're too shy.
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they → be → difference
But I don't mind if it's done politely.
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it → mind → ?
However, there have been times where I've had "Midget!" shouted at me in public by adults.
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Midget → shout → adults
It's upsetting and dehumanising, especially when they know how offensive it is.
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it → know → ?
I was born with hypochondroplasia, which is the second most common form of dwarfism (after achondroplasia).
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which → bear → achondroplasia
It means my limbs are shorter than average.
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limbs → mean → ?
Most people who are born short statured have dwarfism, but there are also some other conditions that cause it.
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that → bear → it
It's often assumed that my parents have dwarfism and that's why I have it.
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I → assume → it
If one or both parents are short statured, there is an increased chance of their offspring being short statured, too.
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offspring → be → ?
But about 80 per cent of people with dwarfism are born to average-height parents.
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cent → bear → parents
As a child, I remember wishing my parents had all the answers.
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parents → remember → answers
For example, how would I drive a car one day?
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I → drive → car
But I had to keep reminding myself that my parents and I were figuring it out together.
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parents → have → it
'What should I do if my child stares or says something?'
When a child sees me, they often do a double take.
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they → do → take
They might point me out to their parent, saying something like, "Why is that lady so little?"
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lady → point → something
Their parent often shushes them and drags them away, shocked.
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parent → shush → them
Obviously, it feels super awkward being pointed out and gawked at in public.
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it → feel → public
I understand kids are naturally curious, and it's not coming from a place of malice, so it's hurtful when parents try to silence their children.
Instead, I'd love parents to use this moment as an opportunity to educate their child and to explain to them that everyone is born differently.
That some people's bones grow slower than others and stop at a quite short height, and that's OK.
It can help me feel more respected, and it gives their child a chance to understand dwarfism a bit more.
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it → understand → dwarfism
Maybe in the moment this isn't the right time for them to do it, and that's OK too.
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'What can I call you?'
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I → sign → you
When you meet an average-height person for the first time, you might say hello, introduce yourself and ask them what their name is.
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name → meet → them
I'm assuming their height isn't the first thing you'd ask them about.
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you → assume → them
I often get asked questions like, "What should I call you?" or, "Are you a dwarf?"
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you → ask → you
My friends and family don't even notice it anymore.
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friends → notice → it
I prefer to be referred to as a person of short stature.
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I → prefer → stature
I know that can be a mouthful, so I'm also happy to be referred to as short-statured.
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I → know → ?
Most people I know use person-first language, e.g, "I am a person with dwarfism" (or short stature), instead of identity-first language, e.g, "I am short-statured" (or a dwarf).
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I → know → language
"Midget" should never be used.
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Midget → use → ?
It's offensive because it's historically linked to the freak shows of the 19th century, where people of short stature were exploited in the name of entertainment.
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people → link → entertainment
And if you're unsure, it's OK to ask politely how that person prefers to be identified.
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person → ask → ?
…and 9 more, not listed.
The Aporia