When you’re seriously ill, wanting to look good isn’t necessarily vanity.
asserted
wanting → ’re → ?
Sometimes it’s about holding on to the person you used to be.
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you → ’ → person
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Teddi Mellencamp has spoken out in defence of her decision to undergo cosmetic surgery while receiving treatment for stage four cancer.
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Mellencamp → speak → cancer
The daughter of singer John Cougar Mellencamp recently underwent an upper blepharoplasty — surgery to remove excess skin from her eyelids – while battling metastasised melanoma.
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daughter → undergo → melanoma
She says her doctors approved the procedure, but the decision sparked criticism, with some questioning why she’d choose to undergo an elective cosmetic procedure while facing such a serious illness.
And I can’t help but wonder: why the hell not?
Why does wanting to feel good about yourself become inappropriate the moment your medical history gets complicated?
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history → say → yourself
Why can’t someone be fighting for their health and thinking about their appearance at the same time?
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someone → fight → time
As someone who’s undergone chemotherapy, I’m firmly in Mellencamp’s corner.
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I → undergo → corner
Not long after learning I’d need chemo as a last-ditch attempt to stop my multiple sclerosis from progressing, I did what any perfectly rational woman facing a life-altering medical treatment would do – I started researching cosmetic procedures.
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I → learn → procedures
My thinking was simple: if I was about to lose my hair, people were going to be looking at my face.
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people → lose → face
And if my face was suddenly the main event, I wanted it to be a good one.
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it → want → ?
Until I had children, I’d always had a picture-perfect smile.
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I → have → smile
But somewhere along the way my once-straight teeth had forgotten their choreography.
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teeth → forget → choreography
Suddenly, losing my hair seemed like an excellent reason to do something about it.
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losing → lose → it
Unfortunately, the dentist had other ideas.
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dentist → have → ideas
Before veneers, I’d need Invisalign.
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I → need → Invisalign
Not exactly the quick pre-chemo glow-up I’d imagined.
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I → imagine → ?
Undeterred, I moved on to plan B: HIFU, a non-surgical skin-tightening treatment.
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I → move → B
I arrived at my consultation ready to hand over my hard-earned, only to be told I needn’t have bothered.
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I → arrive → consultation
The practitioner refused to do it.
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practitioner → refuse → it
I was told my skin looked “youthful” and therefore I didn’t need it.
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I → tell → it
I asked if she’d mind putting that in writing.
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she → ask → writing
Clearly the universe wanted me to age naturally.
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me → want → ?
But I wasn’t finished.
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I → finish → ?
Surely a few strategically placed injections could give me a confidence boost before everything went sideways?
uncertain
everything → place → boost
Again I was advised against it.
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I → advise → it
According to the practitioner, with chemotherapy starting in a few weeks the effects wouldn’t last long and I’d be lucky to get a week’s worth of wrinkle-free forehead.
uncertain
I → accord → forehead
I realised my rather ridiculous quest for a pre-chemo glow-up was about something much bigger than vanity.
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quest → realise → vanity
Following my MS came endless hospital admissions, disease-modifying treatments and eventually chemotherapy as part of a stem cell transplant.
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admissions → follow → transplant
My body had begun to feel less and less like my own.
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body → begin → own
It became unpredictable, unreliable and increasingly what felt like the property of doctors, medications and symptoms I couldn’t control.
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I → become → doctors
Seeking out cosmetic treatments wasn’t about looking younger or more beautiful, it was about wanting some control.
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it → seek → control
I had no power over how my body would respond to chemotherapy, but perhaps I could control my smile, or my skin, or the wrinkles on my forehead.
uncertain
I → have → forehead
And is it any wonder I was concerned about my appearance when women spend their lives being told how much it matters?
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it → concern → lives
Here lies another uncomfortable contradiction.
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contradiction → lie → ?
Women spend much of their lives wrestling against ageing and trying to maintain their appearance, but when we become seriously ill, caring about how we look is considered frivolous.
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we → spend → appearance
You can be terrified about your health and still want nice hair.
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You → want → hair
You can be grateful for treatment and hate what it’s doing to your body.
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it → hate → body
What looks like vanity from the outside can be something far more complicated on the inside.
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looks → look → inside
Mellencamp received the tick of approval from her medical team, so keyboard warriors have no business telling her what she should and shouldn’t care about.
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she → receive → what
As for me, my hair is growing back and I’m feeling stronger each day.
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I → grow → me
…and 3 more, not listed.
The Aporia
